The pin through the plastic body works fine (if the connector is the type I think). The problem is that you really need to see it done.
Having to reset the tang is quite normal and simple to do. On occasions, you even have to reset the tang on contacts that have not been used before- that is no big deal.
Using the official contact extractor tools are best way, but often they are difficult to use, especially if the plugs and sockets are not made by the manufacturers of the extraction tool. The tools are also expensive- unless you get a plastic version which would be useless- and not freely available.
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