True story!
At the pub that used to be just down the road (now sadly knocked down), the landlord used to be a Scot called Kenny - who was 6ft 8inches tall (a big lad!). There used to be a young woman who came in called 'Big Jackie', because she had the largest natural chest you ever did see (48DD for those who might be interested!)
Anyway, a load of us (men!) were sat at the bar one night, and Kenny reaches under the bar and brings out this HUGE vibrator - and says "when Jackie comes in I'm going to tell her she left it here last night". Being normal well behaved males we all suitably giggled, and waited for Jackie to come in!.
She comes in, the pub is packed, and walks straight to the bar - Kenny reaches under the bar, slams it down and says "you left this here last night!". The place goes deathly silent, everyone ready to crack up laughing - but Jackie just looks at it, reachs into her bag and slaps one down TWICE the size, and says "no, this ones MINE!".
Everone absolutely cracked up, but all laughing at Kenny rather than Jackie!.
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