nsaspook: Yes, there are inconsistencies with MC documentation.
atferrari: I used a very similar circuit to give a "smooth" reset while troubleshooting a glitch.
To paraphrase the question, will a 10K to 20K resistor give adequate isolation of the capacitor so ICSP will work well? The obvious option is a jumper that would be removed during programming. The well-known people on the MC forum said yes. But I am wondering about experience here, since even on the MC forum there was some disagreement among the top three (IMHO) of those well known's. MC is, surprisingly, silent on it. It is clear that without the isolation resistor having that large a capacitor is a no, no.
John